Questioning Fate

I barely know me

I need some sort of a revelation, from he who created me

The things I swore I couldn’t do have become a part of me

The things I hate doing

Things that fill me to the brim with self-loathe

Things hidden beneath my teeth and clothes

 

Sometimes I think my very existence is a mistake

My shoulders are burdened by heavy bundles of blame

For a past that I had no control over

Whoever sowed my seeds maliciously laced them with ounces of shame

 

I am sandwiched between two extremes;

Nobody understands me, neither do I

What am I worth?

I am the color of disappointment,

A definition of failure,

The barren branch of a vine that is chopped and burnt

 

The path to righteousness bruised my shoulders

Vanity found me ugly, couldn’t live in me

Love chose butterflies, fled from the dull me

Behind me trail 99 problems

No one in sight to help me solve them

And I am addicted to things am ashamed to pen…

 

What do I stand for?

For what purpose was I created?

Am I the only one these questions?