I changed paths
but still I ended up
at the very destination
I was evading
The more you repel
the greater the attraction
The more you indulge
The deeper the void
These days, my soul
swoons in the gloom
as belief slithers away
I’m losing vital parts of me
And growing parts I hate to have
My eyes are heavily smudged
Days are painful hues of red
Something is scathed inside
Could be hope
could be faith
could be discipline
As it bleeds
It rots and burns my belly
Till hell is poked inside me
flickers rise, sparks violence
then razor edges stained
as my cuts heal
I’ll not need to cut
One day I’ll master enough strength
To spell your absence
And live with the reality
I’ll mask the heart you’ve hurt
This stupid heart that yearns
And aches for the gentleness of your words
Words that would weave an insult into berries
And serve them as thanks
For the travails I put you through
Sun on horizon
We hope it will bring us relief
To revive lives
I guess I fell for a cerelac babe,
no wonder our relationship has teething problems
There comes a day when we’ll sculpt the hollowness of ‘I love you’ and give more meaning to love than wet pants and muffled moans
There is this thing we call sibling rivalry, Well, we never suffered from this disease in our family. We were more collaborative, so most of the time we got neck-deep in shit as a family. In fact, we suffered from a more powerful disease, It’s commonly known as sibling thievery!
My sister June Nyawade and I stole a lot of small things (note that ‘small things’ doesn’t mean we were cleptomaniacs) we stole useful things like maziwa, chapat, mandas, miksi and honey too. you see stealing these small things and getting away with it gives one a very addictive adrenaline rush, we started simple. we were just exploring our abilities and stretching our realities a bit but soon it became a game.
Being that my sister spent most of her days in the boarding school, I was left to exploit these opportunities at home alone. My favorite days were when father came home from Kisumo with two polythenes full of shopping, there would be honey, miksi, goldband and some other sweeties I have since forgotten what they were called…YOu see, I was no thief I was just taking liberties with things I was entitled to, It was the time of serving that I didn’t approve of, I was no thief I was just impatient.
It so happened that one day, I had come from school for lunch, as mama was busy in the kitchen I took my sister Dorcas, then still a baby to her crib but I didn’t stop there..I walked to the door and called mama twice just to make sure she hadn’t followed me.
‘Aaaan’ mama itikaad
At this point you have to be very creative
‘Nyathini pek manade kawuono yawa’
‘hahahahaha kwani ikia ga ni ng’at manindo pek’
‘ooyo mama afwenyo kawuono’
‘tim piyo, ilokna rombono kapok idok sikul’
Having made sure that the disciplinarian was busy, I hopped into her bedroom and opened the kabat..2kgs of Miksi just stood there waiting for me…my ooh my…no spoon! what do you do? cup your hands and do the scooping-licking, scooping-linking and then baang the bedroom door opens…and then history! I went to school without taking lunch…
From that day henceforth I swore not to indulge my impatience in absence of my accomplice, so when she came back we pulled the mother of all thieving.. we drank all the milk we were given to boil..when mama came back she found us very busy teaching Lucy some manners..Lucy was once a faithful cat, dare we call this corruption? Lucy was just a Josephine Kabura, the Waigurus were the ones ripping it’s skin off now..
‘yawa pakanani tinde osechako kwelo yawa’ is all mama said!
I know June Nyawade will say this is a lie
I also know That I have just fooled you!
Should I say I envied my brother?
Whenever he sneaked you home
When time stood still as you mourned
When the double-decker shook
And every inch you flinched tightened my pants
Did I ever tell you how beautiful you were?
No, not beautiful, just sexually stimulating
That every time I saw you I did an x-ray on you
And had sex with you in my fantasies
No, you could never know that;
My bulge was always concealed
By tight triangular briefs
Did I tell you of the sleepless nights?
When even in your absence
The sheets still smelt of your presence
And the crickets stopped their chirps
As your ‘imetoooosha’ pleas boomed in my mind
Did I tell you of the many nights I dreamt of you?
Only to wake up in sticky sheets around my ass
Ohh shemeji, how I yearned for you
I could have given a pair of balls
Just to hear you mourn my name
Till now the vulnerability in that voice
As it said ‘imetooooosha’ still thrills me
Shemeji how quick the world has beaten you!
It was just yesterday I yearned for you
Today your nakedness can deflate my erection
You’ve aged shemeji. So quickly shemeji
Did you marry a man?
Please do and dump the beast
He’s squeezed the juice of life from your ass
It now sags like peels of skin on the back of a donkey’s balls
Your skin once radiant now a labyrinth of scratches and folds
My old shemeji how the world has beaten you!
I am so Gay
No time for haters
Christ himself rode on an ass